1954 B&W 71min
Starring: Peter Graves, James Seay, Steve Pendleton, Frank Gerstle, John Fenderick, and Barbara Bestar.
Directed by: W. Lee Wilder
This is a very forgettable movie. I just watched it, and I am
actually having trouble remembering what happened. Maybe it’s because
I’m tired or didn’t pay attention. Or, maybe it’s because almost
nothing did happen in this movie.
Well, googlie-eyed doofuses (or is it doofi?) from space, but you get the idea.We start, of course, with a narrator who informs us that a nuclear
test is underway. Operation A-bomb test, to be exact (Naming things is
hard, isn’t it?). We join the observation plane after the bomb has been
dropped. They are monitoring and recording radiation information from
the bomb, until the pilot sees what appears to be a fireball on the
ground. When they go to investigate, the plane’s controls seize up and
they crash.
The military finds the body of the pilot, but the passenger, Dr.
Martin, is nowhere to be found. Dr. Martin, unbelievably shows up at
the base, virtually unscathed, with the exception of an L-shaped scar
on his chest and a case of memory loss. Martin assumes that he received
the scar in the crash, but the Doctor examining him says that it was no
injury, it was surgery, an expert incision (Oh yes, the giant, hideous,
L-shaped scar was obviously the work of an expert).
Aha! Obviously the work of Zorro's little brother, Larry.Despite Martin’s physical condition, the military wants him to take
a few days off to recover and regain his lost section of memory. His
wife (Who resembles a poor man’s Beverly Garland), agrees and takes Dr.
Martin home. But later that night Dr. Martin is having trouble sleeping
(he should try watching this movie), so he gets up and phones the base
for information on the next atomic test. When they refuse to give him
any information, Dr. Martin is infuriated, and decides to go down to
the base, but his wife is able to talk him out of it, and they make
sweet, sweet (implied) love.
The next morning, Martin gets the paper and sees the headline, “NewPetitions Against Tax” and is steamin’ mad. Although, it might have
been the other headline, “Another Atom Bomb Exploded” that got him
angry. That would make more sense, wouldn’t it? Anyway, he storms down
to the base and gives the higher-ups a piece of his mind. He says that
he feels fine and should have at least been informed of the test. They
ignore his argument and he is ordered to relax (Ordered to relax???
Peter…relax…NOW!!!).
New petitions against tax!?! Damn conservatives! He storms off to his office and goes a little crazy on his secretary
before giving her the rest of the day off. Dr. Martin decides to stow
away in his office until everyone goes home for the night. He then
loads up his favorite pipe (You’ll see why later on) and goes snooping
around Dr. Krueger’s office for the information on the atomic blast.
Having found what he wanted, he buggers off, but not before dropping
his pipe tobacco and forgetting to close the safe that he just swiped
the files from (Doofus). A soldier on patrol duty sees the open door
and file cabinet and informs his superiors. Dr. Krueger is brought back
to the base and tells the FBI agent that he was sure that he locked the
door and that DR. Martin was the only other person who had access to
the vault. At this time the FBI agent finds the pipe tobacco that
Martin dropped (D’oh) and gets suspicious.
Ewww…Right on the rug. Later we see Martin in the desert placing a note under a rock.
Unfortunately for him, the FBI agent is there. Martin looks at the
agent and we get a weird focus on his eyes (Again, you’ll see why later
on). Dr. Martin decks the agent (Smooth) and takes off. He stops at a
gas station to fill up and call his wife. Before he can leave, however,
his description is given out on a police scanner at the station Martin
looks at the attendant and again we get the weird focus on the eyes.
Martin speeds away and the attendant calls the police. Maybe he
should’ve decked this guy too…just a thought.
Dave Miley*…FBIWe are then treated to pointless footage of the police station
receiving the call, the operator writing the message down, popping the
message in a vacuum tube, the message popping out of the vacuum tube,
and a man reading it over the radio. This sequence doesn’t achieve
much, but it does eat up about a min of running time, so mission
accomplished, I guess.
Remember the FBI agent that Peter decked? Well, apparently Graves
has a killer left hook, as he is still out. He awakens to his squad car
radio. They inform him of Dr. Martin’s whereabouts, and he speeds off
in the direction that he was last spotted.
Meanwhile, Martin is driving when he sees that pair of creepy eyes in front of him again and quickly proceeds to crash his car.
The Mt. Rushmore of ugly He awakens in the military hospital, mumbling about things being
here to destroy us. He does this without moving his lips, I might add
(Great dub job guys). They inject Dr. Martin with “truth serum” and
begin to interrogate him…
And now we reach the interrogation flashback. The best part of the
movie. The part where stuff actually happens. It doesn’t make a lot of
sense, but stuff does happen. And this is a whopper of a flashback. It
starts at 33:35 into the film and ends at 54:05! That’s 21 minutes.
During the flashback we finally learn what happened to Dr. Martin after
the crash. We finally learn what the eye hallucinations are all about.
We finally get to see the “Killers From Space.” Well, enough talking
about it, let’s get on with the review.
We begin the flashback after Graves says, “I’ll tell you the whole
story” (that’s really not a sentence that you want to hear in these
movies), with the accident. Martin explains that he awoke on a table,
being operated on. At this point we get our first glimpse of the aliens
in this movie. Let me try to describe them. Ok, picture a normal guy
Put him in a form fitting leotard, tape two wooly bear caterpillars to
his eyebrows, then cut a ping pong ball in half and paste it over his
eyes, and you’ve pretty much got it. Here’s a screenshot for ya…
I don't know what he's looking at, but I'm sure that it has something to do with “Hot girl-on-girl action” Now then, back to our flashback, Martin gets off of the operating
table and is greeted by an alien. The alien says that he is a scientist
like Dr. Martin. He explains that they brought Dr. Martin back to life
after the accident. They say that they need his services. The alien
then uses a plastic pith helmet with a swirly light bulb in the middle
to activate a video screen showing Martin the origins and purpose of
the alien species. It seems that the aliens are accumulating all of the
energy from the atomic explosions. They need it to invade and conquer
the Earth. They plan on enlarging several species of critters and
marching them upon our cities.
Dr. Martin scampers off and attempts to escape but can’t find his
way out of the caves, and wanders around aimlessly. Until he runs into
a few giant spiders, that is.
Now if I ran into a giant tarantula, I think that I might freak out
a little. Graves, however, displaying all the acting talent of a plank
of wood, kind of just stands there with a blank expression, staring at
it.
After some more emotionless staring he runs away…right into a giant lizard and has the same reaction (or lack thereof) that he had to the
spider. He then runs into a giant cockroach, grasshopper, more lizards,
a horned toad, more lizards eating what appear to be scorpions, back to
the grasshopper…Whew. That’s a lot of giant critters. This continues
for what seems like forever, until Graves gives up and goes back to the
alien.
Our alien friend continues to fill us in on his purposes for being
here. Dr. Martin slowly begins to piece the aliens plan together. The
alien offers Dr. Martin his safety if he helps the aliens in their
plan. Martin agrees, but the aliens have a lie detector and know that
he is planning to betray them. So they hypnotize him and erase his
memory. To make sure they ask Martin, “What have you seen or heard
here?” To which he answers, “Nothing.” Amazing. That’s the same answer
that I would given. And with that, we come to the end of the flashback.
Of course, nobody believes Dr. Martin’s story. Martin is certain
that they must set off another nuclear charge to overload the alien’s
energy reserve. Mrs. Martin shows up at the hospital to find Dr. Martin
freaking out. The staff subdue and convince Dr. Martin to go back to
his room. He asks for paper, pencils and a slide rule (He must have a
science project to finish or something). He works on his project until
Dr. Kruger shows up. Doug explains to Dr. Kruger that he has a plan
that will destroy the aliens without dropping a bomb. He just needs to
cut the power to the city. He thinks that the aliens are drawing their
power from the plant by parallel induction (neat, huh?). If he cuts off
the power to their containment equipment it will unleash the power that
they’ve collected from the nuclear tests and destroy their layer.
Once again, nobody believes him and he must take matters into his
own hands. He escapes the hospital (Yes, the one on the MILITARY
BASE…Great security) and heads for the power plant. He makes his way to
the control room, but not before we see a man, who I swear is Coleman
Francis. Honestly, it’s totally him. Look…
Big Coleman Francis In any case. Dr, Martin finally reaches the control room and orders
the operator at gunpoint to kill the power. The FBI agent makes the
most feeble attempt to disarm an individual that I have ever seen. He
doesn’t go for the gun or try to incapacitate him at all. He basically
gives him a hug. He’s an FBI agent for cryin’ out loud. Shouldn’t he be
armed? Anyway, the operator finally cuts the power and, after about 8
sec. we get a big kaboom, just like the Dr. predicted. The blast could
be seen from inside the power station and it more than took up the
entire window…I think they’re going to die. But what do I know? THE END.
Great, We’re all dead. Thanks Peter.
Conclusion
This is a very sloppy movie. Odd edits, poor special effects, and
plot holes that you could drive a Mac truck through. But, perhaps the
best example of the sloppiness of Killers From Space is this screenshot…
